For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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