can we get nightvision for the apartment?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
