She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize