I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
