we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
