Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Randomize
