Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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