Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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