No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
