i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
