i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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