Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize