R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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