Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
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