he puts the penis in happiness.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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