whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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