if only i could text you this smell
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize