I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize