Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
nutella sex= disaster
i dont even know how to be here
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
