You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize