yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
