tell your sister to shave her snatch
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
organizing the empties. That sober.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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