did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize