Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
