I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
