i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
