Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
