But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Randomize
