i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
