watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I got her a Nickelback box set.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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