JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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