ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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