Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
