Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
