Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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