whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
