You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
