You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize