Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
