Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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