just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Randomize
