Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
