Are we in a gay sports bar?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
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