no, he came in my armpit
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
