Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Randomize
