dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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