you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Randomize
