Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
