That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Randomize
