Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Enjoy the penises
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
